Finally a BREAK!

Yes!  Finally a break.  When we called Sloan Kettering they told us they could not see my sister until September 25th.  Are they NUTS!?!?  By that point she'll be so far gone that we could sue them for neglect!  Well with calling the right people and making sure to get on their heels, she has an appointment for this coming Tuesday at 3pm.  So August 3rd is her first appointment.   I know that they are going to want to keep her for more tests and get her started right away on treatments but this is where it has to begin.

I just spoke to my mother who broke down a bit on the phone with me.  My sister was sleeping after taking the pain medications so my mother figured it was okay to let herself go a little.  She just cried into the phone and said how am I going to be able to do this.  I can't handle this and she was so scared.  I felt so damn helpless on this end and told her that once she is here which will be just a day or two more, I promise her that I will be here to help out and make sure that I do all I can to lift some of the weight off of her an onto myself.  I just hope I can handle what I am about to do.  I think everyone is scared here...

Its quiet here now.  I opened the windows of my house to air everything out and as soon as my stomach stops rumbling around from nerves I'm going to get things started.  I have to give my dog and cat baths again and also clean the house.  It'll take probably most of the day but at least it'll keep me very busy which is something I need.  I think its like therapy.  Cleaning, the gym and anything else that completely exhausts me is therapy.  Classes are like torture.  I just sit there trying to concentrate on whats going on and instead I sit there thinking of ways to help the situation and my mind winds up coming up completely blank.

I just so wish someone could tell me and my family that everything will be alright and that Cindy will be ok.  Something that no one can do.  But a lot of people are praying for her and for that I am thankful.  The more prayers the better, I hope He hears us and helps us.

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The house is now spotless... and its 10pm at night.  Just adding a little extra to this post rather then start another one.  I took the entire day to literally clean the house, take care of the pets and their baths, I even washed my parents blanket and took care of the towels too!  I am utterly exhausted but I feel good.  Like I got so much accomplished and that when they get here tomorrow I'll know that it'll all be worth it. 

I got lots of help as well.  My aunt and uncle were here, mostly for support but they treated me to dinner and helped me pick up a few things that I need to finish things off where Cindy will be sleeping.  Chris helped me clean and is still here now helping as I type (taking a short break).  My friend Erik did some running around for me earlier and picked stuff up from the outside for me and that was a huge help as well.  Well tonight I'll sleep good and tomorrow I'll get to see my sister and give my family a huge hug.  I really missed them all more then I thought I would.

G'night world.