BIG smiles!

And heres the other one! :)

Growing up

Heres two pictures of Melissa that I took over this passed weekend, I can't believe how big she got, and she slendered out as well. She is still such an amazing little kid and truly a VERY good child... Cindy would be so proud and probably is... thanks to everyone who came this weekend and thanks to Cindy for giving us Melissa.. my pride and joy.

Strange moments...

Have you ever had a series of strange moments that actually make you nervous or scared? Well that's me this morning. I had a horrible dream last night that I was running through a hospital crying out loud "I dont want to die, and please help me". My hands were turning blue and I kept looking at my knees that were darkened with blood inside. Every time I would finally find a doctor they would smile in pity and say they were sorry but they couldn't help me. I kept showing them my hands for some reason and how the nails and fingers were turning blue. But the strange part was how hard I was fighting... I had plenty of energy but no one would listen to me.

I woke up very upset. As I staggered into the bathroom this morning I kept checking my hands and knees, and I moved just a little slower this morning. I wondered if Cindy had a dream like that before she passed away. If she was screaming inside like that and no one could hear her. It was frightening.

I got to work at 8am, which is where I am now. I have a new job for those of you who don't know. I thought that I had finally shaken off this strange feeling I've had all day but instead I just got a nose bleed... that didn't help put my fears to bed.

I guess you can say that I'm having an unsettling day, and all I can do is hope that it gets better as the day progresses... I wish nothing but good thoughs, dreams and days to everyone.